If I die
before I find him, as perhaps I may--my heart being so bad--I wish
you to see him when he comes back, and to give him the accompanying
sealed packet yourself. Nobody knows how I have loved him all my
life, and perhaps if I had been better tempered and less jealous,
he might have stayed at home, and not been obliged to go away for
debt. But when I have found him, I will be very loving and patient,
and then we shall be happy together again. If I don't find him,
however--if I die first--will you, dear brother, talk to him as you
have talked and written to me, and then I may meet him again in a
happier world, where I am praying and striving to go, through the
atonement of Him who died for sinners--even for me and Howel, who
are both great sinners--yet not too great to be saved. Thank you,
my dear, dear brother, for showing me the way to heaven, and for
all your goodness to me and Minette--(my poor Minette, I must leave
her, but you will all take care of her better than I have done).
Thank you, I am very sorry that I was such a wilful, perverse
sister, when you tried to do me good.
'God bless you for ever and ever--you and all--Your loving but
afflicted sister, NETTA JENKINS.
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