It must have been my own careless levity that has prevented me from
feeling like Lizzie; but I cannot believe--'
'You have not been the director of the school for the last few years,
as Lizzie has,' said Lady Merton; 'the girls under your own
protection are younger, their trial is hardly begun.'
'I am afraid I shall be disheartened whenever I think of them,' said
Anne; 'I wish you had not said all this--and yet--perhaps--if
disappointment is really to come, I had better be prepared for it.'
'Yes, you may find this conversation useful, Anne,' said Lady Merton;
'if it is only to shew you why I have always tried to teach you self-
control in your love of the school.'
'I know I want self-control when I let myself be so engrossed in it
as to neglect other things,' said Anne; 'and I hope I do manage now
not to shew more favour to the girls I like best, than to the others;
but in what other way do you mean, Mamma?'
'I mean that you must learn not to set your heart upon individual
girls, or plans which seem satisfactory at first,' said Lady Merton;
'disappointment will surely be sent in some form or other, to try
your faith and love; and if you do not learn to fear now that your
hopes are high, you will hardly have spirit enough left to persevere
cheerfully when failure has taught you to mistrust yourself.
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